Radical Mothering

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Hi!

I love to hear back from people.
You can find me @bigmothering on instagram, or contact me via this form.

bigmothering

And reading of course 😂 (how did I forget?!?) L

And reading of course 😂 (how did I forget?!?)
Listening to books and podcasts.
Watching videos.
Conversations - sooooo many conversations.

Some days I’m all coversationed out! 😅

Nothing against teaching. I will absolutely teach them if asked, and if I have the expertise or can seek it out with them. But frankly, they don’t love to be taught in a teachy way by me 🤣 and I don’t love being their teacher.. so it’s win win 🙌🙌

Tell me how your children love to learn without to teaching them 👇

Just a reminder that calling for a ceasefire is so

Just a reminder that calling for a ceasefire is something we can all do.

Please call and write to your reps (I have a highlight with links) to urge them to call a ceasefire and an exchange of hostages from both sides (those held by Hamas, which include 37 children, and those held without trial in Israeli jails, which include 170 children).

Please donate to @thepcrf if you can.

Pls follow Palestinian & journalists’ accounts, both in Palestine and abroad: @eid_yara @motaz_azaiza @aymanm @byplestia @wizard_bisan1 @mariambarghouti are just a few I am following.

Talk to people about this issue.

Allow it to radicalise you.

This is a child rights issue, and an issue of collective liberation.

I’m not debating the right to freedom and the value of human life in the comments.

Edited to add: I won’t tolerate anti-semitism or anti-Islam on my page. I recognise that many people are not feeling safe right now, and this won’t become a place for that.

#homeschoolfamiliesforaceasefire #unschoolersforafreepalestine

I wrote a Substack post about how children so ofte

I wrote a Substack post about how children so often bear the brunt of our adult decisions.

They are, fundamentally, not seen as full citizens. The world we’ve created, especially the industrialized, Western world, is simply not built for them.

I could point to a million small ways children’s presence from public spaces - what we often refer to as “adult spaces” but are actually everyone’s spaces - is actively not encouraged. And how in the process of limiting children’s autonomy out in the world, the existence of children as independent beings, valued for just existing and for their contribution to society, is erased.

When adults see children out and about in the world that belongs to them, too, they are asked “what they’re doing out here on a school day.”

Can you imagine being questioned about why you’re in a coffee shop or the supermarket or the park “on a work day”?

Our warped conception of who children are and what they deserve means they are most often the tragic casualties of war, of defunding public services, of lack of gun control regulation, of rampant capitalism, patriarchy and white supremacy.

It’s all connected. The ways we treat children at home, in schools, out in the world, and during periods of crisis and war.

Full post at the link in my bio.

You think what you’re doing, living outside the

You think what you’re doing, living outside the school system, is radical?

Well - here’s what radical means: advocating for fundamental, deep change and affecting the very roots, the fundamental nature, of something.

I stand for freedom of all children and people, and I refuse to support and fund the collective punishment of the Palestinian people.

But what about the hostages? I want the return of all hostages, ON BOTH SIDES. The Israeli hostages held by Hamas, the Palestinians held without trial in Israeli jail.

Punishing the Palestinian people is not the way to do either of those things.

Apparently all of this is radical now.

I have a highlight with links for where to donate and who and how to write to you reps.

I’ll be joining @annialtgeld and many other homeschoolers in calling for a ceasefire and immediate humanitarian aid to Gaza, among many other things.

You can participate from wherever you are - please use the hashtag #homeschoolfamiliesforaceasefire and I’m gonna go with #unschoolersforafreepalestine because that is how I feel.

I am not debating the validity of human life in the comments, so don’t even try it.

I know many of you are silently doing your part, and I want to say that I see you, too.

Free Palestine 🇵🇸

Image: @annialtgeld and @the_yarrow_patch (I think!)

Have you noticed how people often say they don’t

Have you noticed how people often say they don’t “get” unschooling or that it doesn’t make sense?

I have a little theory about this and here it is.

I think part of the reason some people fail to truly “get” unschooling - and by "get” I don’t mean they necessarily agree with it or want to do it, but just that they understand what it is and why it might actually work for some - is that many people refuse to accept the fact that everything is socially constructed.

Part of the reason people are even still asking “But what about Math?” and “How will they learn?” and “How will you teach them?” and all sorts of other questions, is that perhaps they haven’t had a chance to reckon with the fact that so many of our ideas and practices - that we take for granted, that are a given in our society - are entirely fabricated.. by us.

Perhaps they’re fabricated for a reason, and perhaps those reasons sometimes hold. But they are nonetheless made up. Just made up!!

So what many of us mean when we say we’re “letting go” of things/ideas or we’re deschooling: we mean we’re recognizing everything we believe is a social construct, and considering whether we actually need it in our lives.

Is it still serving us, like it served one of our ancestors (or a bunch of other people) way back when? Because a lot of these constructs were made up “way back when” and we’ve just carried them through generations, without questioning or doubting them, to the point that they became “normal.”

They become the way things are done.

And unschooling is all about disrupting The Way Things Are Done.

Read my full post about why I think we should all try to understand unschooling, even if we’re not actually doing it!

Link in my bio & stories.

🤸‍♀️Sign up to my Substack to get more of these posts in your inbox. They are free to read.

It’s all connected. None of it is separate. What

It’s all connected. None of it is separate.
What we do in our homes is what we do in our groups is what we do in our government is how we vote is how we organise is how we show up.

This is an unschooling & child lib account but most of all it is an account that centres consent, which means the ability to have ownership of ourselves and to preserve our wholeness.

War is a violation of consent.
Inequality and apartheid are violations of consent.
Forced birth is a violation of consent.
Gun violence is a violation of consent.
Being a child in the mess we’ve made is an effing violation of consent.
Being a child while bombs rain down around you is a violation of consent.
Being born in an adultist world is a violation of consent.
It’s. All. Connected.

Full post on Substack, link in bio.

We say we want to raise rebels, non-conformists, c

We say we want to raise rebels, non-conformists, critical thinkers, truth-tellers.

We say we want our child to question things, to refuse to unthinkingly comply, to speak up for what they believe in.

But what are WE doing? Are we speaking up? Refusing to comply? Questioning?

Are we standing for something, anything?

We say we want to raise rebels and non-conformists, but to what end? Rebellion for its own sake is not radical - it’s just selfish. Non-conformism to no end is just a performance.

We say we want to raise rebels, but do we talk to them about what rebellion is for? What non-conformism serves? The rebels and radicals of the past and present?

Do we show them how to step up, when it’s time for us to do so. Do we show them how to speak up even when it feels hard or scary?

We’re laying big things on our children’s shoulders, and giving ourselves a pass.

If we want to raise rebels we need to show them what’s worth questioning. They need to see us resisting, pushing back, taking risks, loving loudly and boldly, picking up the phone and refusing to shut up.

It’s time to put our money where our mouth is.

Write to your representatives to demand an immediate ceasefire in Gaza. Genocide is never okay.
Call them, daily (I have a highlight with some links to help you do this.)
Give money to organisations in Palestine (links also in my highlight)
Share marginalised voices widely.
Keep going.
It matters.
Choose love and choose joy but don’t look away.
Sharing online, this counts, no matter how big or small your platform is.
Talk to your friends and neighbours.
Tell your children what you’re doing when they ask. They are able to understand.

Children have strong sense of justice and equity - perhaps we’re the ones that need to be reminded of this.

The other day I realised that I self-direct allll

The other day I realised that I self-direct allll the time and it didn’t used to be like that.

I realised that all the things that bring me joy and that I care most about - from quilting to unschooling to writing - happened because I wanted to do them and I figured out how.

This doesn’t mean I did everything myself. Far from it! I learned from others, from websites and online accounts and books and podcasts. But the initial motivation was mine, and the commitment to staying the path was also, ultimately, mine.

Recognising the ways we self-direct as grown adults matters!

💜 It matters because we realise learning never ends. I’ve learned so much more since I left school than during it!!

💜 It matters because we also recognise that our drive and ability to persevere comes from within.

And once we see these two things we can begin to recognise that there are no real deadlines for learning, that outside validation will only get our children so far, and that guidance and support and community matters so much more than compulsory curricula and exams.

How do YOU self-direct? Tell me below 👇

We belong to you and meeeee!! Okay enough with the

We belong to you and meeeee!! Okay enough with the Bee Gees, let’s get to it ;)

I’m so excited to share this episode of the podcast!

I chat to Sari González and Becka Koritz @radical_learning about the nuts and bolts of deschooling: what it is, what it looks like, the places we get stuck and the ways we get ourselves out of them!

I absolutely love how real they are about their own struggles and process, and how expansive their understanding of deschooling is.

Must-listen for anyone in the weeds of deschooling (and isn't that every single one of us?!).

Let me know your thoughts!!

We currently live in a busy, hot city and some day

We currently live in a busy, hot city and some days our only time outside is when we’re walking from one thing to another.

Is it ideal, for me personally? No, not at all. I miss the beaches and forests and trails. That is my subjective preference.

But is it somehow inherently worse or not good enough? Nope.

A beach is morally neutral - neither good or bad.
A city street is morally neutral - neither inherently good nor inherently bad.

Some kids might love living in a city and feel lost in rural areas, and vice versa.

Play is play. There is no universally good way to play, and no wrong way to play. Sure, there are ways to play that feel more child-led and respectful towards children. There are ways that play is more free and unstructured. But this kind of play can happen on cement, gravel or grass.

There is no hierarchy of play.

All free play is valid 🙌

The question is often: But What About Maths? Are

The question is often: But What About Maths?

Are we just going to let Maths go, or like, can we unschool except for Maths? And HOW DO WE UNSCHOOL MATHS?!?

Can we use curriculum or make Maths non-negotiable and still be self-directed?

Well - first off, you can do whatever you want!

Don’t let anyone tell you there is a “correct” way to do this. There simply is not. You and your child and your family are unique and you have unique reasons for doing what you do. You are choosing to educate your child, or live without school, and you can do it however seems to work best for you and them!

That said, my Monday posts offer practical thoughts and resources to support you with unschooling, so that’s what I’m going to do.

Go see the full post on the link in my bio 💖

I’m thrilled to be sharing a post by Kel @subsom

I’m thrilled to be sharing a post by Kel @subsomatic , who writes on Swimming Upstream. Kel is an insta-friend of mine, and we’ve been following each other’s unschooling journey from afar, and connecting in so many ways. I’ve been inspired by Kel’s openness and vulnerability in exploring difficult topics like the role of whiteness and colonialism in the systems we inhabit. I am endlessly in awe of Kel’s talents in weaving and zine-making and their writing around anti-capitalism and mutual aid.

In the post, Kel writes about the ways capitalism and our dominant culture influences how we parent, and our ideas around success, power dynamics, “wasting time” and more. Go read the full post! It’s brilliant.

Link in stories and bio 💙

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